The Aim of Ambition

"Aim at nothing and you'll be sure to hit it." Someone once delivered this maxim in a sermon or lecture and it has stuck with me ever since. No one can accuse me of not being ambitious. I may have several flaws, in fact, I know I do. But a lack of ambition is certainly not one of them. Rather if there were an accusation to be made I feel sure it would have to be something contrary to that.

A few weeks back - it was actually over Spring Break - I was able to read Proverbs 31. Along the margin of the text there was an interesting little inscription. It read, "To be worthy of a virtuous woman one must be a man of integrity," and made a reference to Psalms 15.

Though I've certainly aimed at something, or rather someone, I realize now I've aimed too high. I've aimed for the stars. Though I certainly did get a flicker or a twinkle from them it was inevitable for me to fall back to earth. And I did - with a crash. The girl I like is a virtuous woman, not perfect - she would hate it if I even thought that - but certainly virtuous and, this is the best part, striving for more virtue. But I, on the other hand, stand a far distance from being the man of integrity as shared in Psalms 15.

Yet there is another maxim that encourages me - Dream big. God's bigger. This also is true for God alone can surpass our dreams. Even so I wonder if I was too unrealistic in my expectations. Too rash, perhaps. I thought I could handle something so great as a relationship when in reality I can't even handle my own life right now. But God alone knows how lonely I am...